There was a time when it really wasn't a debate. When a woman got married and started a family, she would stay home to raise the kids. But those days are long gone. In today's world, most women want to work or have to work in order to make ends meet. But for some, the question will loom if they are doing the right thing for their kids by working. Many moms are now considering taking time out to raise the kids.
Deciding If You Can Mom Full Time
The first issue that would come to mind if a woman is considering taking time out to raise the kids is whether or not she can afford to do so. In this economy, it's becoming harder for one parent working steadily to be able to support the family. So the first thing any woman would need to do is figure out if the family can financially afford for her to give up her job. Even if your spouse has a great job with great pay that seems to have a great future, there is still a chance he could lose his job due to a layoff or cut backs. Think about how the household will function with only one paycheck coming in. Will your spouse's paycheck be enough to cover the family's basic needs?
There are ways around the money issue. For example, taking on a work at home job or arranging with your current employer to telecommute can help supplement the household income. Even taking a part time job while the kids are in school will allow you to continue to contribute the household finances.
Aside from financial concerns, you will need to talk to your spouse about the fact that you want to be a full time mom. Remember this decision will effect him as well, and you will need his support if you are considering taking time out to raise the kids. Perhaps your spouse will want to know why you want to take time off from work to stay at home. He may even be uncomfortable with the idea. It can be alarming for a man to realize that he is the sole provider for the family, especially if he grew up with a working mother. Be sure you understand yourself why you want to become a full time mom. If you are pregnant, maybe you want to take the time out because you don't want to miss out on those developmental years with your baby. If you are a mother with school age kids, maybe you feel that you aren't giving them the time or attention that they need, and maybe you think it might be affecting their performance at school. Whatever the reason, be sure to think things through.
Being a stay at home mom can be a fulfilling thing for some, but boring for others, especially during those hours where your newborn is sleeping or your kids are in school. Just remember that taking time out to raise the kids may seem like what is best for your kids, but it may not be what is really best for you. You could find momming full time isolating and feel you are cutting yourself off from your friends, and other adults. This is why it might be a good idea to have something to occupy your time with other than housework. If your family is well off financially, you can volunteer your time, for example at your kid's school. This is a great way to be involved in your child's education and to make yourself feel useful at the same time.
The women who succeed at being a full time mom are the ones that enter into the arrangement with their eyes wide open. They recognize that the experience can be boring, frustrating, and unfulfilling, but they also know that they are doing something that will strengthen their homes and families. Just remember, a good mom takes care of herself too. She can't be there for others if her own resources are tapped out. If you decide that taking time out to raise the kids is the right thing for you, go forward with confidence and humor.
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